Getting an ex-girlfriend back isn’t a simple process. It requires a lot of thought, strategy and even a little bit of luck. It’s imperative that you read this guide before making your first move so that you don’t spoil any chance of getting her back for good.
First of all, there needs to be a period of no contact. She needs her space. You need to give her a chance to miss you. Don’t wait so long that she’s already moved on, but be careful to give her the time she needs. If you’re not sure when that time is, check out the video below that describes a foolproof system for getting back your ex.
After you use this technique, you can attempt your first text message. Now, the purpose of texting her is to build an attraction to ultimately transition to the phone call when she’s ready. Once you achieve this, a phone call will eventually lead to contact.
To learn the keys to building this attraction and how to break the ice, there are 2 Vital Rules and 3 Secret Texts that will get back your ex-girlfriend.
The 2 Vital Rules to Win Back Your Ex
It is critical to follow the 2 Vital Rules when texting your ex to ensure that you keep her attention and keep her wanting more.
Vital Rule #1: The 50/50 Split
No matter how hard it is, you can’t always be the one to start the conversation. Trust me, when you follow Vital Rule #2, it shouldn’t be hard to have her texting you first. If you’re the one always texting, then you come across as clingy, and it will just turn her off. You must leave her wanting more and thinking about you enough to reach out.
It might sound strange, especially if she is mad at you, or the relationship ended sourly, but I promise, with time, all women will reach out. It’s what they do. But if you jump in, all that you will do is remind her of the end of the relationship, and it will be impossible to create a new relationship with her. Instead, when she reaches out to you in due time, it will be out of her desire to connect with you, which will plant a strong seed of desire in her mind.
Vital Rule #2: End the Conversation on a High Note
This rule is two-fold. First, you have to be the one to end the conversation; and second, you have to end it on a high point. Think of the way conversations usually go: typically, the conversation will start with small talk, then it builds up to a high point, then it starts to plummet to the lowest point of the conversation where both parties are boring and have nothing else to say and have both worn out their welcome. Then, the conversation ends.
Now, when you’re texting back and forth, and you really get into a conversation, and it seems to become more and more important until it reaches a high point. Just at the point when you think that the conversation couldn’t get any better, that’s when you end it. If you don’t end it at that point – the high point – then there’s no way that the conversation can be topped, and that’s when it will begin to plummet.
If you really want your ex back then, you don’t want to leave any conversation with a bad taste in her mouth. And, ending the conversation at the low point is going to do that. So, when exactly is the right time to leave the text conversation? How do you know it’s the high point of the conversation? Well, imagine if you were texting your ex and she was really enjoying the conversation with you. Things had heated up to a point where she wanted nothing more than to hear your response to what she had just texted, and then all of a sudden you stopped responding. It would drive her crazy! You would have hooked her into a conversation and then released her.
Keep Reading for the 3 Secret Texts That Will Get Her Back!
3 Secret Texts to Get Your Ex Back
Secret Text #1: The Icebreaker
Before I tell you the first Secret Text, you need to know that it’s all about building rapport and attraction. You really have to plan out the perfect text if this is the first one after your relationship ended. You want to get back on speaking terms with your ex. Attraction takes time, and you must make sure you’re attractive to her.
Now, I’ll tell you what is not attractive:
- Texting about anything negative about your relationship – only talk about positive things
- Texting about sex or anything in that realm. Women think men only want sex anyway, so don’t make her think you want her back just to get laid again. Make her see the other side of you.
- Texting late at night or drunk texting – put a lock on your phone to avoid this critical mistake!
Okay, now for the text. You will want an icebreaker text. Nothing heavy like “I miss you” – just something that shows her that she popped into your head and you wanted to share something with her. For example, what does she like? Cats? Send her a cat video (or picture) and make a short statement about it, like “hey, I thought of you when I saw this – thought you’d like it.” But whatever it is, make sure it:
- Is paired with a picture or video because that’s more effective than just a few words
- Is light-hearted and not related to your relationship
- Pique her interest with something that she is interested in
Secret Text #2: The Storyteller
This next text won’t come right on top of the first of course, it will come with time after you’ve built rapport – maybe in a few days or a couple of weeks; but, when the time is right, your next text will follow the storytelling method.
Have you ever binge-watched a show on Netflix? You never set out to binge watch, it happens because each show will leave you on a cliff-hanger that you feel compelled to watch the next, and the next, and the next – no matter how early you have to get up for work the next morning.
Well, that is exactly what you want to do! You want to make her want more. You do this by ending on a high note, or a cliff-hanger. Maybe you can tell her about something completely bizarre that happened on the subway or about something you heard on the radio – but don’t tell it all in one text! You don’t want to give away the ending. Instead, give her just enough to make her want more. If you don’t get a response right away, then draw her in; engage her in your story with a ‘check-in text’ by saying something like “are you with me?” or “can you believe this?” or, “can you guess what happened next?”
The point of this storytelling through text is to be lighthearted and funny but to pique her interest, so she engages with you to hear the rest of the story.
Secret Text #3: The Transition
The purpose of this final secret text is to naturally transition to a phone call. Again, take your time with this; build up to it, it’s not going to happen overnight, and you don’t want to scare her off. As you’ll find out, attraction can only be built so far through text, so you must transition to a phone call at some point, then ultimately, in-person contact.
So, how do you do this? Well again, you’ll want to pique her interest by texting something that is of interest to her; maybe something in the news that you heard – nothing too heavy but something that she has a vested interest in.
The key is to give her the positive aspects through text, but keep it limited. Cut yourself off and say, “Actually, let’s talk on the phone this is too good to tell over text message.” This will be a good test to see if she’s ready to move to the next phase of attraction building through phone calls, or if she’s still just comfortable with text messages and you still have more attraction to build.
If you follow the above guidelines, then I assure you that you’ll be talking to your ex again in no time. Just read her cues to know when to move to the next transition, or when to give it more time. Good luck!